Last year was a tricky year for us. We went through a whole bunch of stuff with our eldest boy.
Some of it was indeed his fault, but some of it most certainly was not. It seemed as tho he was always in trouble, from January thru to November! There were moments where I had him by the scruff of the neck, marching him into school, apologising to whoever he needed to apologise to. There was even one moment where I had to physically shield him and bare my teeth ready to fight like a mother lion protecting her cubs.
We fought in his corner when he needed protection, and we dished out the punishment severely whenever it was required.
We were parenting as best we could, but as they say, kids don’t come with manuals.
I’ve noticed throughout my nearly 12 years experience as a mum, that I’m forever making decisions, from ‘should I let her wear those plastic high heels to school’, to ‘should we make him go to college even tho he’s not sleeping at night with anxiety over the change’. Right alongside my decision making has been SELF DOUBT, crippling self-doubt….am I doing the right thing by my children, the right thing by my family. In fact, I find I struggle with self-doubt in most situations. Am I good enough?, should I be doing more?, have I done the wrong thing?, am I doing the right thing?…what if?!
When I worry like this, I can worry for days, going round n round in circles.
Just as I can guarantee self-doubt, I have also encountered the remedy, it often appears when I’ve hit rock bottom, and comes in the form of words or a smile.
We all need a few positive words in our life to pick us up and keep us going. I always remember the lovely words people speak to me, and the lovely people who speak those words to me.
“look at what beautiful children you have.”
‘You do an amazing job.”
At the end of the year in 2017 my confidence was at a low, one morning I was at school walking the kids to class, in an introspective bubble. One of the teachers approached me, and her words lifted me out of my funk, they gave me confidence, my attitude shifted, man I needed to hear those words.
“One day when I have kids I hope I’m like you, I think you teach your children the right things.”
My heart sang! The world was right again with that one sentence.
We’re all walking round in our own personal bubbles. I reckon if you make an effort to smile and speak those kind words instead of thinking them and walking on, you may just change that persons’ life for the better. If you can do that, then you are truly valuable, and when you help others, it feels good too, so it’s a win-win.